Random

Mini Cadbury eggs... just might be the only thing worth gaining weight for. Goodnight! I seem to lack self control when it comes to these beautiful eggs. Sadly, (no I'm not proud) we finished a bag in about three days and promised we'd wait a while before we got another one but then yesterday was my birthday. I wanted them. So I got them. And I knew I was going to have brownies and ice cream but I got them anyway. And now every time I go into the kitchen I find myself grabbing a couple (or maybe 5 or 6) Bless my heart.

Anyway, tomorrow my sister finds out the gender of her baby! I'm so excited for her and so anxious to find out. She has a daughter and then three boys. This will be her fifth child. They are all adorable and I could not be more happy for them.

The weather this week has been fantastic. In the 70's all week! It has definitely lightened our moods and brought an extra natural joy. We have taken advantage because next week is back to the 50's and 60's - which I know, still isn't bad.

Yesterday was my birthday and it was so fun. I hope everyone feels special on their birthday. I got several phone calls and texts and had a great evening with my family and our neighbor. It was nice and relaxing. For one of my gifts my husband got me the current country weekly magazine to look at for the day- (okay I may have bluntly told him I'd love to have it) but he was still sweet to get it and I enjoyed a good dose of Jason Aldean.

We have lots of exciting things planned for this summer! My husband found out he has four days off the end of may so we are really hoping to take a trip to Palmyra. That is a must before we leave the east. In June my oldest sister is coming and possibly bringing her daughter. Ahooa! I can hardly wait. I called her and told her Tim McGraw and Kenny Chesney are putting on a concert here and that was all I needed to say. It wasn't too hard to persuade her and I can hardly wait for that concert and to see her! Also, my neighbor and I got an amazing deal and together we will be attending 4 country concerts this summer. Bangerang! We are stoked. We really did get a great deal and this is probably the only time in life I would be able to do this.

We grilled Salmon the other night. Hi! Why have I not done that before? It was delicious and truthfully I could eat fish every day. I love it and we will definitely be having more in this household. Super easy too.

My daughter. She is cracking us up lately and really starting to put words together. My husband and I are constantly learning as she is changing and graduating to new stages. She is such a joy!

Institute. I attended today and paid extra attention and really participated more than usual. I love our teachers, i love that it's a small group of us, and I loved our conversation today about signs of the second coming, 14 fundamentals of a prophet, and general conference.

A quote I read from a blog today that really hit me and is going to help me when I have my down moments or any struggles is this, "fighting through darkness and despair and pleading for the light is what opened this dispensation. it is what keeps it going, and it is what will keep you going. " That was from Elder Holland. I love it.

Lots of wonderful things are going on here, but we've got our struggles too. I try to pretend to be supermom sometimes and put on a face, but it's just me trying to be positive and push through. Some days are very much earth life here in our home but for the most part we have it really good and I'm trying to focus on our blessings because I know we have so many.

Tomorrow is supposed to reach almost 80 degrees and this is truly worth celebrating! I'm sure we will go for a walk and go to the park. We're also supposed to meet up with some other couples from my husbands school and grill out for dinner at a park. Plus there is still cookie dough ice cream in the freezer. It's going to be a good day :)

mixed emotions

Thank you for the wonderful comments on my last post. They truly helped me and I am doing better.

I find myself with some mixed emotions lately and I'll somewhat explain why. I've been on the phone a bit lately with a dear friend who has a family member going through an awful divorce right now. As she calls me to talk things out and explain situations I found myself getting frustrated- why is this family letting Satan attack them? How did it happen? Where did it start? My heart hurts for her and her family. It's truly a very sad situation and I wish I could fix it. I feel like I'm part of their family and find myself struggling with her emotionally. I want everyone to have a happily ever after. Well, right after one of my conversations with her, feeling a bit frustrated and rattled at how all this came about my mom calls me with the news that another friend had lost her husband to cancer the previous evening. I found myself grieving her loss but the emotions were so different. Theirs was a beautiful love story of a wife and husband who adored each other and were truly one. Only married a couple of years but so in love. I have followed her blog and it was very touching- the way she talked of her husband and took care of him through this whole process. Two different stories with very different emotions.
Love is so precious and so fragile.

I find myself texting my husband during the day, giving him a call, taking his hand in the car, look him in the eyes when i say "i love you", being a better listener, making more time for us, and all those wonderful things that I should do regardless.
Life is wonderful and hard. The things that bring us the greatest joys are the things we have to work the hardest at. Every day. And oh it's worth it!
If you ask me, I believe I have the best husband in the world. I will brag about him, lift him up, let him know he can accomplish anything, and be his biggest fan because I love him and he is everything I've wanted and I love our love story. It's not perfect and yet, it is. It's good :) We fit each other perfectly. Occasionally on this blog I will "brag" about our lives- not to puff us up or put anyone down, but simply because my family is my greatest joy and I am proud of our accomplishments and where we're going, what we're doing. and while I could go on and on about it all, I'm going to save that for a later date and go join my husband because it's time to just be us :)

Life

I feel like I keep learning the same lessons over and over again. You'd think I'd learn. Honestly, I get lonely and bored. And seriously there's no need to be that way because I have lots of friends here and I believe a lot of the sisters in my ward feel that way. I think moms in general feel that way often. (the lonely part) I love reading and I love doing projects but right now it's really hard to do some things while my daughter is awake. She's good to entertain herself for a little bit but for the most part she wants my attention, which I'm happy to give and she is entitled to it. My problem- what to do! I can only read the same books and play with toys for so long day after day. Same with going to the stores and to the library. I'm ready for a change. I realize I'm complaining a bit but I just need to write some things out. It's winter time here. The weather is actually pretty good and this last week we even went to the park one day. Our whole family was on cloud nine that day! But for the most part the days have been gloomy and the skies gray. It really starts to take its toll on a person. Today when we walked out of church there was blue sky and the sun was shining. I almost started crying I was so happy. We are ready for blue skies! It just feels like things are getting so routine, so mundane. I'd love to work on some projects but we'll be moving back to ID in 6 months and can only take what we fit in our car and trust me we've accumulated quite a bit of stuff already. there's a lot we're going to have to leave behind. so that's basically it, I get in these "wo is me" moments and it's hard to get out of them! I don't like it.
So on the flip side, I'll read my friends blog who lost her daughter in a tragic accident, or another blog about a man who lost his wife, or hear about families who are really struggling with something and then everything gets put back into perspective and I realize how blessed I am and how good I have it and how happy I should be EVERYDAY. Honestly I get frustrated with myself sometimes. Why is it so easy to forget our blessings? President Hinckley said something to the effect of "when we are unhappy it's usually because we are only thinking of ourselves." How true! Life is good- I know it is! But I feel like this is an ongoing cycle for me. Of course there's things I can do better and I can be more creative- I just need to kick it in gear and do it! I need to call the awesome sisters in my ward and get together with them. They all have amazing talents and gifts that I can learn from. I need to serve. I know there's others who fall into these pits like I do. So, basically that's it. It felt good to get it out and some things came to me as I was writing this down so I feel much better now.
tomorrow is supposed to be almost 60 degrees so I think we're going to go to the park with some friends :)

Valentines

A clean kitchen + fixing lunch + a sweet handwritten letter + dancing in the living room = true love. It was a GREAT day! :)

Today

Today was a great day! I don't know why, but I feel like writing it down. I don't want to forget it. Perhaps I'll need to look back on it in the future. I got up at 5:00, exercised, came home and made my family baked oatmeal for breakfast (sooo good)! Then after we all got ready we took my husband to school and then my daughter and I went to a couple of stores. I was able to find her 3 skirts for the summer for $1.50 each. If you know me, I am extremely frugal and will rarely buy anything full price so this put a smile to my face (thanks Walmart). Then we came home, played catch, read some books, vacuumed, and mopped the floors. Then it was nap time so I took to scrubbing the bathroom and cleaning up the rest of the house, read a couple conference talks, fb, pinterest, blogs,...etc. Then the mail came- two packages!! one, a cell phone for me (I have been without a cell phone for a week after leaving it on the subway) :( We had an extra spare one in the family so we didn't even have to pay for a new phone. thanks mom!! Then two, my sister sent us a package with some clothes for my daughter and some cute valentines! She is so thoughtful and always calling to see what we need. She has such a big heart. She's always thinking of others. Love you sis! I talked to my hubby letting him know I had a phone again and he informed me he and some other guys in the ward needed to help move chairs with the elders quorum right after school and that the elders quorum would provide pizza for all them. I'm happy to have my husband serve but it's a big bummer when he says he'll be home later than originally planned. I've felt quite lonely this week, it's been hard, so I thought no way am I just going to hang out alone all evening til he's done! so I called up all the wives and had them come over for dinner since our husbands were together having pizza. It ended up being so fun! It was way chill- they all came over and I just fixed quesadillas and cut up some veggies and made a cookie dough graham cracker dip. We had a great time and I was ready for some socializing. After everyone left, we had family prayer, song and scripture study and now the sound of the dishwasher is going and my little girl is tucked into bed and I'm going to go make my husband stop studying for the night so we can be together. It's been a great day, a hard week for me in some other ways, but writing out my day like this has helped me to see the good in it and how blessed I am. Perhaps that's why I felt I needed to write it down.

Scotty McCreery - Dirty Dishes (Yahoo Music Session)

I love this song. I love his voice. I love that he is a good boy. I love that he is country. I love the message of this song. So enjoy!

Today has been a great day, nothing amazing out of the ordinary, but then again every day is a blessing isn't it? Today was different then yesterday though. Yesterday I just felt blah all day long. I had no motivation to get things done. It was just one of those days. However, today I turned it around and my daughter and I had a good time! We went to a couple stores, read books together, played catch, and colored. My husband also came home to a fantastic new meal! (Thanks Heath for the idea!) Raspberry chipotle chicken salad with black beans, corn, rice, cheese, and homemade salsa on top (sooo yummy and fresh!) and then homemade lemon cream cheese bars for dessert. There were smiling faces all around the dinner table tonight :) Our awesome neighbor even came and shared the joy with us. I love her. Then later this evening as my husband was giving our daughter a bath I read my aunts blog, who is serving a mission with her husband in the Cape Verde islands. What an inspiration she is! She has a true gift of writing and I felt the Spirit so strong as I was reading her blog. This is the second mission she and her husband are serving and I'm so grateful for their wonderful examples. So many things she said has touched my heart tonight but something in particular really made me think. Quoting my aunt, she said, "It is too easy to forget our blessings as we roam on earth trying to keep up with them." I had to think about that for a minute but I love her point of view. I'm sure it can be taken a few different ways but what it means to me is we are swimming in blessings! The Lord has been so merciful to us and we truly have blessings beyond measure. So much that we almost "forget" them or take them for granted and maybe don't recognize them as blessings. I love that quote from her. Time to look at all our blessings instead of maybe what we don't have. Because when we look at what we do have, we'll realize we already have it all.
Just this past Sunday was fast and testimony meeting for our ward. The Spirit in sacrament meeting was incredible. My husband and I both commented on it. We absolutely love our ward. I hope everyone can say that. We've both been in awe so many times at the willingness to serve and help out. I was humbled in so many ways with all the testimonies that were given this past Sunday. One in particular about a brother who has been looking for a job for a year and a half now and getting teary as he told how it hasn't been easy to watch his wife work two jobs for the family. He spoke of their trials and their faith and how after a long week of dealing with lice in their home his wife turns to him and says she's happy. She's content. The faith coming from this man and his family was almost tangible. Others bore solid testimony of the basic truths of the gospel in such a humble and powerful way. There are so many amazing people to look up to and learn from. I would stay here forever just to be in this ward. But then again that's the beautiful thing about the gospel- It's full of wonderful people everywhere you go! I'm just so grateful to be where I am right now. I know it's where we need to be and the Lord is giving me so many opportunities to grow and learn and become better.

Now, my husband is studying and I am about to go to bed so I can get up and exercise. The forecast for tomorrow is rain so perhaps tomorrow will be a movie day with my daughter :) Life is good!

Jumble of thoughts...

It's interesting, living away from the "mormon bubble" as some people may call it. There's always going to be pro's and con's wherever one lives and I could spend a long time talking about that subject alone, but I'm not going to. I love where I'm from and I'm happy where I'm at. Truly happy. In some ways I really feel myself growing here in ways I wasn't at home. Other times I feel myself getting caught up in some "worldly" things and then I have to refocus in on what's most important. What's hard is that sometimes I may be lazy about something and not even realize it. Then I have a lesson about it in church and I think, whoa! I gotta start doing better at that- when did I let that slip? You know?
Now I realize I'm skipping ahead here but stay with me. Facebook. It's a love/hate relationship and I would say most agree with that. I am home a lot (especially now that it's getting cold!) and sometimes facebook is a nice social outlet. Same with blogging. My ward has a FB group that all the sisters can get on and ask questions or post activities or things for sale...etc. It's FANTASTIC! It's been such a help for my family and I at times. I love it. Lots of good things about facebook. My problem- sometimes I get on there and start comparing! worst. thing. ever. i know! So then I start feeling down thinking "well so and so's husband did this" or "wow they went on a cruise" or whatever it is... no bueno. The same goes for blogging. Some people only blog about the "highlights" of life, naturally. And so I start comparing again. So, I'm working on it. I think we all have to work on it- maybe in different levels but I think we all struggle with it to a degree. So, I'm trying to spend less time on the internet and more time doing things worthwhile, like reading. I love love love to read. That one is not hard for me. I could read all day long if it was an option. Also, I'm going to serve my husband more. It's one of my new years resolutions and I'm quite ecstatic about it. I went to a marriage workshop yesterday for a Relief Society activity and came home with wonderful advice and a lot of ambition to make my husband the happiest man alive. I love him so much.
Church. I just got called to be in the primary presidency. I am sooo excited! A little nervous too. I have not been in primary since I was in primary as a child, so I'm re-learning the ropes again. I've only been in one Sunday and I already had tears in my eyes. Those children are so precious and who can deny the beautiful Spirit those children's songs bring? I am humbled to have this calling because I know I will learn more from them. After all, aren't we taught to become like them?
Institute. I attend institute every thursday. I love it. The missionary couple that teaches it are so awesome and they come so prepared. I love that hour and a half lesson each week. It's one more reminder of what really matters.
My husband, my daughter, scripture reading, and prayer- they are the most constant everyday reminders I have of what's most important. They keep me on track and help me so very much. I am so so grateful for them. I recently read in Nephi when he says "Wilt thou make me that I may shake at the appearance of sin?" and King Lamoni's father says in reference to God, "I will give away all my sins to know thee." Another scriptural account says, "their hearts had been changed; that they had no more desire to do evil." I love those scriptures. I want that. I want to get to that level of trust and faith and one mindedness and I know I can. I know I can. It excites me to think about it. I love the daily reminders in the scriptures that teach us what we need to truly be happy.
The temple. My husband and I, along with some friends were able to go to the temple the other day. First time since we've left home. I've missed the temple. It's not easy living in a place where the temple is far away. The night before, when my husband and I discussed and decided we were going to make it work, that we were going to the temple the next day, I got tears in my eyes. I was so excited and so ready to go. It was a wonderful experience. It always feels right to be in the temple. What beautiful blessings and covenants are promised and made there.
So, back to my earlier discussion, I need to stay focused on the positive things about life that really matter and let go of all the nonsense that keeps me from being that much closer to my Savior. I'm going to do it. And as for reality- I already have it "all." there is no need for me to compare. I have a handsome husband who is working so hard in school to provide for our family, I have the privilege of being a stay at home mom to our beautiful, healthy, happy baby girl. We have been sealed in the temple for time and all eternity, and we almost always have homemade cookies in our home. :)
I realize all these thoughts might not make sense to anyone but me but I've had so much on my mind lately and I needed to jot some things down.

Today, my daughter and I skyped with my mom and my grandma. Four generations skyping together. It was so great! One of those times when you feel pure joy. And I know it was pure joy because I looked over at my daughter talking to her grandma and great grandma and she had the same look on her face. She kept reaching out her hands for my grandma to hold her. I know she remembers her. She also wanted to play "patty cake" with my grandma and she is the one who taught my daughter that. I wish time could have frozen for a moment. I know we all felt so connected to one another.

Life is good!